I had a more video game centric post in mind when it came time to writing my usual weekly update. Instead, something a little personal and introspective kept tugging at the deep corners of my brain to be written. I try not to write too much about myself and I try to focus on the geekier or fashion-minded side of things, but I suppose I can tie those usual themes I write about into this post too.
A few days ago I celebrated the birthday of a good high school friend of mine. She just turned twenty-eight, and we went out to celebrate with a mutual, former high school classmate of ours and another friend of hers. As we sat around the table over dinner, we were reminiscing about the good ‘ol days. It’s kind of strange when you already reach the age where you can say, “the good ‘ol days.”
I think when you reach your late 20s and are not too far off from 30, you start realizing how life can just catch up with you. The usual consensus is, “Wow, it was only just yesterday when we were in grade school, high school, college, etc.” You start realizing how things were simpler as a kid. Things just get harder as an adult. We have more responsibilities, schedules get in the way and there is less time to see friends, and we are at the age where people are getting married and having families of their own. I still get an out-of-body type of experience when I hear my friends are getting married or are pregnant with their first child. It feels as if I am an observer of someone else’s life that isn’t mine. I kind of feel like I am still that kid who is playing Barbies and watching Saturday morning cartoons like X-men, Batman, The Little Mermaid, and every great cartoon of the 90’s. Those were the days.
I have mentioned this before in older blog posts how I don’t particularly have too many video game memories in the same way my cousin and other friends do. They can talk about what it was like the first time they ever owned their first home console, or the exhilarating feeling of playing Mario for the first time. Usually when I hear them talk about it, I am fascinated and a little jealous that they can talk about these things with such passion and vividness.
Now, I didn’t live under a complete rock when it came to video games as a child. I played a little of Mario, Mortal Kombat, and even a game I used to love which was Aladdin back when I went over to people’s houses or in my grade school’s after school program. The only reason I never owned a console myself was because my parents didn’t believe in getting me into video games. I was okay with that too, mainly because I didn’t feel the need to have to own one. I was perfectly content with playing Barbie dolls and dress up like most little girls do at that age.
Fast-forward to junior high and high school, the big thing for me was anime and manga, particularly Sailor Moon. It was my obsession when a friend I used to be super close with introduced it to me. I would devour anything and everything that was Sailor Moon. Once I had my fill, I had to seek out more like it. This was when I formed more of a geeky identity. It wasn’t something I wore like a badge of honor in high school, but it was something I quietly enjoyed and gushed over with the only friend out of the group I had who understood the anime/manga love fest.
Where is the point I am trying to make with this post? As I ate dinner and danced the night away with my friend on her birthday, it made me realize how comforting it was to reflect on the time spent as a kid when things were innocent and the possibilities in life were so endless. It’s like coming home to what is safe and familiar. These childhood memories felt safe and familiar. At times I wished I had a time machine where I can go back and relive all those memories again. I really miss my childhood, and I wish I could recapture those moments again. As much as I am focused on pushing my career forward, finding love, and trying to carve out a satisfying life for however long I will be on this earth, I would gladly take the opportunity to be that little girl in my room who loved playing dolls and dress up. If I had known what I know now, I would have slowed down and appreciated being a kid. Simplicity like that is a one time thing, and it’s better to bask in it rather than rush it.
Have you ever been hit with the same nostalgia as I have? What did you miss about growing up? What would you relive if you had the chance to?